Surgeons Launch Designer Brand: Chic Cheeks
~ A micro-satire from the fictional wards of Hospital Woeisme ~
Longtime friends Dr. Ricardo and Dr. Mertz recently launched their line of designer hospital attire called Chic Cheeks. The women met as undergraduate students and connected over their shared goal of becoming surgeons. They supported each other through the arduous years of medical school and their respective surgical residencies.
Now as attending physicians at Hospital Woeisme, the duo continues to do research and participate in charitable projects together. Their most recent venture, however, took shape far outside of the operating room.
In an interview with Drs. Ricardo and Mertz, they shared their inspiration for entering the world of fashion. Dr. Ricardo explained, “One night after rounds we noticed a patient walking down the hall and struggling to keep his robe covering his bottom while heading to the bathroom. We felt bad, you know? It’s hard enough being a patient, and having your butt stick out from a cheap, ill-fitting hospital gown just makes it all worse.” She looked at Dr. Mertz, who continued, “We started joking that the patient’s should at least be showing off their bums in designer wear, and ta-da: Chic Cheeks was born!”
Once the women developed their concept, they pitched the prototype gowns to several potential investors. At the pitch meeting, Ms. $ Bags, a philanthropist and hospital donor, reportedly yelled out, “I hate those stinkin’ assless gowns! You two design something flattering and comfortable, and I’ll give you your startup capital!” Once funding was secured, the women moved into production.
Each gown is handmade using all-natural fabrics. On checking into the hospital, patients have the option to upgrade from a standard hospital robe to a designer Chic Cheeks gown. Since the women are surgeons, their most popular styles feature intricate patterns stitched into the fabric.
The first robes designed were made of silk and linen. The subsequent winter collection expanded into heavier and warmer textiles, such as velvet, and cashmere and merino wool. The spring collection, debuted at New York Fashion Week in early February, features gowns that are hand-dyed using a Japanese Shibori technique. The ancient art form creates tessellated patterns that are unique to each piece created.
Their initial investor loved the results; Ms. $ Bags raved, “These women made my hospital stays so much better! Instead of those flimsy robes, I’m keeping my butt warm and comfortable in a designer gown.” Another patient shared, “I just love the velvet hospital gown! It’s like those velvet tracksuits everyone used to wear, but for hospital patients!”
The burgeoning fashionistas have already expanded their business. They now sell grippy socks, made with plush fabrics and available in a variety of jewel tone colors. They also sell Covid-appropriate N95 masks that feature replicas of famous artwork, such as Monet’s Water Lilies and Van Gogh’s Irises. Their most recent expansion involves creating designer scrubs. They were able to capitalize on a recent boon in new clients seeking comfy work wear due to the viral advertising fallacy of a well known scrub business.
The latest additions to their line of accessories are oxygen tank covers, and charms to decorate one’s nasal cannula tubing. Inspired by wine bottle covers they saw while on a working vacation in Milan, they thought that the knit covers would help patients feel less self-conscious about schlepping around oxygen tanks and tubing. As with their initial impetus for creating the gowns, the women continue to focus on developing clothing and accessories that improve a patient’s hospital experience.
Chic Cheeks brand is not without controversy, though. The high output of hand-made items by two busy surgeons has raised suspicion among some buyers. There are rumors that medical students on their surgery rotation are being forced to sew and embellish the gowns in a sweatshop that is hidden somewhere in the hospital. If their stitching is not high enough quality, they reportedly risk failing the rotation. As medical students have minimal work-hour restrictions, little oversight, and do not get paid, (the opposite in fact, medical students pay to work as they are students), they are an ideal labor force for the company. Not surprisingly, no medical students could be found that were willing to speak out against Chic Cheeks this close to Match Day. Drs. Ricardo and Mertz maintain that all of their products are made either by themselves, or by fairly compensated surgery residents.
Controversy aside, the women’s company is growing fast and gaining popularity. Due to their success outside the hospital wards, they are considering opening a boutique downtown. As of publication, non-patients interested in obtaining items from Chic Cheeks can visit the Hospital Woeisme gift shop, or find them online at their new Etsy shop.